Mighty Final Fight & Angels

Why do they need such big heads? They look like those awful Funko Pop things

MIGHTY FINAL FIGHT

(Sanchez Crew, 2018)

I'm not really a huge beat-'em-up fan in recent times. Sure, I've been happy to give Tekken a quick go or two, but I've got no interest in such as Street Fighter, Mortal Kombat (shout in your head when you read that please) or any similar retroesque affairs. But on the Speccy we were quite spoiled really with the likes of I+K=?, Dragon Dragon, 2 out of 3 Renegades and any number of Ways Of Thes. Don't worry, I'm not having a stroke, it was just a really poor sentence.

"Miso, miso. Fighting in the dojo. Oriental prince in the land of soup"

So since consoles can't be bothered doing fighting games right (in my uninformed opinion), leave it once more to the Spectrum boys to bring the noise! There have been a few fighty games in the modern era, so I thought I'd nose at the two least boring looking. Just kidding, I'll give them a fair trial, honest. I'm getting my knuckle dusters on as I write, which is messling with my tryping no end.

This area's so rough, even the grannies are queuing up to pulp you

First Chronos-logically (worst Spectrum pun ever) comes Mighty Final Fight, a mighty silly name but it came from Japan of course, on the NES originally. I'm not familiar, but I'd imagine this to be a close copy. You have the task of ridding Metro CIty of those crazy punks The Mad Gears (I want to call my gang that now) who have kidnapped the mayor's daughter. The sort of thing that never happens in real life but frequently in films and games.

It's painful when you get double-teamed like this. No wonder his eyes are bulging

A typically strong Sanchez intro gets us started, including a fairly essential training sesh (don't skip it like I always do the first time) and even a choice of 3 fighters, including the Mighty Moustachioed Mayor himself, who's proper pissed. The presentation is strong with this one, and once your choice has been made, a-lamping you can go. A couple of miscreants wander onto your screen, you beat em up but good, using special moves when earned, then you get the 'GO!' prompt and on you can jog. At the end of each bit waits the obligatory Bobby Big Boss.

Trash Talk Simulator comes before each boss fight

Ah, this is darn good stuff. Resembling Target; Renegade, the only game in history to feature a semi-colon, with changing cityscapes throughout, it's graphically excellent, and sonically so too. Slightly less funereal choons than T;R too. Gameplay is nice and easy to pick up, though I found my magenta-strength special move did for most foes a bit too easily perhaps. But it's great fun to play and feels proper arcadey, which is a smashing (?) achievement I reckon.

I found it hard to beat this guy 'cos I couldn't stop laughing

They're harder than they look, Becky from Roseanne and her gal pal

ANGELS

(Zosya, 2021)

And so onto Ultraviolence Part II, Angels. Can the mighty Zosya outdo the also mighty Sanchezes? These two Russian combatants really do represent the pinnacle of modern Spectral programming, so we're in the best possible hands. Or bloodied fists. Let's hope they fare better than Dolphin Lundgren in Rocky 27 at least.

This game involves 'tasteful nudity', a rarity with European games

"Would you like to meet girls who are out of this world?" Well, you're in luck, as Kira and Rika, who may or may not be the Cheeky Girls, have been sent to cr@ppy Earth to fight crime as a punishment for being unacceptably ugly by Neptunian standards. They must rid 5 of your Earth cities of their scummier elements so they can zap back home again.

Kira attempts page 78, figure 3b of the Kama Sutra For Homicidal Maniacs

One can do flying kicks and the other excels in flic-flacs (I checked the spelling on that one), neither of which seem to be terribly useful but they do look nice. You can swap fighters at any time and they both have their own health bars. Every few successful thwacks they land grants them a big attack. So there's an element of strategy involved in keeping them both alive as long as possible. You can only move right, and sometimes left, so making space for yourself becomes crucial.

I think Rika's in Italy now, as two goons stare into the abyss

There's a surprise mini-game in between levels, where the gals get into their bubble car type space pods and fight their way upwards to their next locale. It's fun, if rather pointless as you can't die during it. Wonder if Zosya are planning a scrolly shooter any time soon? Gasp. I'm going to write them a begging letter right now...

Not terribly normal for a fighting game, but this bit is way better than I.C.U.P.S.

As you'd expect Angels looks amazing. Great graphics and a shock of colour, plus brill music on the go. It's a fun play, if a little more limited than Mighty Final Fight, since going up and down isn't allowed. But the level of detail and general classy feel of it can't be denied. So for my money, these are two awesome beat-'em-ups, worthy enough to be whispered in the same breath as Fist and Target; Renegade. But make sure you do only whisper that, or you'll get beaten up.

Out in the woods Kira comes across a guy pretending to be Christopher Walken in The Prophecy

MIGHTY FINAL SCORES

MIGHTY FINAL FIGHT 92%

ANGELS 90%